“You never leave your partner! Especially in a fire!”
Fireproof is one of those movies that teach you so many important lessons about what it is to be a decent person. To live right, to love right, to be right in yourself and with others. It is, first and foremost, a movie about what it takes to make a relationship work and though it is religiously based, it doesn’t detract one bit from the truth of the message. Some things are just universal truths.
Some men are so concerned with getting respect and admiration that they don’t realize how little they really give to their partner. They put their time into impressing their bosses and coworkers or buddies. They have everyone’s back but their wives/girlfriends. They often know very little about who their wives/girlfriends even are!
When their relationship falls apart, they think it is out of nowhere; that it is a sudden occurrence. They’ve been ignoring the women in their lives for so long they only notice her at her worst and when everything is at its breaking point. If they acted towards their bosses the way they treat their partner, they wouldn’t have a job for very long either. You get more of what your put your attention on.
Many men at this point think that the problem is that the woman just doesn’t appreciate them right or they call women crazy. Then without any second thought of the relationship, the person they were with, the time invested, they just move on to someone new and shiny.
Some men are so busy playing the field when they can’t even figure out how to keep one woman happy. It is never their fault. It is easier to “throw a person away and start over” than to look at yourself squarely in the mirror and fix yourself; to become the kind of man that’s worthy of even one woman.
So many men think if they “just find the right woman”, she’ll treat him right. He’s bought into this idea that he’s perfect and just needs the “right woman” to recognize it. The mantra of these guys is something like, please don’t be crazy, because after all he does nothing to make her miserable. She did this all to herself.
It is never his problem, but he’s always starting over again with someone new. How can this be?
No matter how many times he’s seen his relationships fall apart or never really gel, he keeps on believing the false idea that he’s a good guy/the injured party waiting for the right woman.
It is sad really because if most men put in the work and dedicated themselves to one woman they could in fact BE the men they imagine themselves to be and have the lifetime of happiness that they dream of. As it is though, that remains a distant and unattainable fantasy for many men. Too much ego and false pride keep them from true happiness.
Of course, I won’t leave you hanging with a sad story. There is hope! There is something you CAN do about it to change your relationships and change your life for the better!
The Love Dare asks you to commit to 40 days of challenging yourself to genuinely love someone. In the movie the father gives this book to his son as a challenge when his marriage is about to end in divorce. To whet your whistle for the movie or if you choose to click on the link above and take the challenge, here is the introduction to what you’re about to take on,
This forty day journey cannot be taken lightly.
It is a challenging and often difficult process, but an incredibly fulfilling one.
To take this dare requires a resolute mind and a steadfast determination.
It is not meant to be sampled or briefly tested, and those who quit early will forfeit the greatest benefits.
If you will commit to a day at a time for forty days, the results could change your life, and your marriage.
Again, you don’t have to be married for this to improve your relationship and ultimately your life. As the preface says, you have to have determination and resolve because, “Love, in its truest sense, is not based on feelings. it is a determination to show thoughtful actions even when there seems to be no reward”….and don’t just follow your heart, ’cause your heart can be deceived. But you gotta lead your heart.”
So I come back to the beginning of this post, “You never leave your partner! Especially in a fire!”
In the movie, Caleb was a firefighter and he understood this concept in his job. By the end of the movie, he understood how this applied to his wife and to his marriage. Ultimately, by accepting the challenge with all his heart and taking the heat, he did save his marriage and changed both their lives.
Change your relationships. Change your life.
– with love from aneternaltraveler 😉