I have to let go. I’ve built this protective layer of fat around me to insulate me from the emotional pain. It used to feel good. It felt safe. It doesn’t feel that way anymore. Now, I hate myself. I laugh at my self. I puke out the over indulgence. I have overeaten my pain en route to the satisfaction that never came. It doesn’t work. It hurts now. It’s time for change. Abuse isn’t love…even when you do it to yourself. No exceptions.