Tag Archives: Ecuador

Travel Picture Gallery – Ecuador

Leave Room for Surprises

Sometimes I forget to leave room for surprises.  The past couple of days have taught me that even in the worst kinds of situations there are people  who will remind you that your heart can still sprout wings.

Surprise Example 1)

As you may be aware, I don’t feel like my current job is the best fit for me.  I go in each day trying my best to stay positive.  I feel very under appreciated.  I’m bored out of my mind working way beneath my potential despite my best efforts to expand my opportunities.  What’s more, I don’t find many people to connect to.  Most seem to want to know about me for the purposes of finding the latest gossip topic.  So, I don’t share.   It stays at the surface and they fill in the blanks.  I want my connections to be genuine.

Yesterday, I opened up to someone at work who took a heart-felt interest in my time living and working overseas in Ecuador.  As I talked, the passion and excitement poured out of me.  I was speaking entirely from my heart. Then, I had this moment when I “came back to reality” and saw where I was. I felt so far away from this passion in my current reality it almost hurt to talk about it.

When I finished my story she said, “It sounds like you really felt appreciated there.”  I said, Well yes. I guess I did.  I felt like I was really living my life and making a difference. ” She asked me if I’d considered working in an NGO.  I said, “most definitely and I’ve applied for positions at a lot of them.  However, you need to know someone to get in.”  Then she said, “Would you like to talk with my daughter?  She works for (insert huge well known NGO) and she’s helped other people. ”  I nearly cried then I gladly accepted and thanked her when the breath returned to my chest.

Surprise Example 2)

Today, I left my lunch at home.  One of the staff that usually gives me a lot of trouble, found an extra PB&J, some chocolate milk and an apple which she offered to me.   That really warmed my heart twice over; kindness from an unlikely source and food for lunch.

Another staff said she overhead part of yesterday’s conversation about Ecuador and wondered if I’d share more.  It turns out we are very much alike spiritually and in our life views.  Finding people like these are treasures to be cherished.

Surprise Example 3)

One day a few weeks ago at my second job, a colleague and I had an all out fight that was so bad that had to be taken into the office and settled with the manager.  We were clashing in a very bad way and the tension just kept getting worse. We’d tried to settle it before, but it didn’t work. Once in the office this time, each of us just let it rip, gloves off!  It ALL came out.  Then, we had to go out and finish the shift with each other.  So we tried to make the best of it.

The very next shift we worked together, it was as if you couldn’t find two people who enjoyed each others company more.  Some strange unbreakable bond was created.  I knew he had my back and he knew that I had his.  

Today was my last day at my second job. I got hugs and thanks from other staff which was nice, but ironically he was the only one who actually took the time to give me a  card.  It was homemade and filled with simple but thoughtful sentiments.

So, from now on I will do my best to remind myself that I am not alone in my way of being in this world and to stay open to being pleasantly surprised.

With love from aneternaltraveler 😉

 

And so it begins…

When I was a child, my mother asked me ‘what I wanted to be when I grew up?’, as parents often do.  I said,

 Mom, I want to learn all the languages and cultures of the world so I can get to know what’s in people’s hearts.  That way someday I can show them how to come together in peace.

Looking back, my mom must have thought I was a quite a handful!  I was always the do-gooder type that wanted to help people around the world.

As life progressed, I loved having the opportunity to travel even if it was only for business.  Over time, I’d seen 20 countries on 5 continents and I lived for over a year in Ecuador.  I never wanted it to end.  I thought I was unstoppable.

However, during the past few years, I’ve gone through some really rough times and my confidence was shaken.  A tough divorce, fighting like the be-jesus to try to hang on to my house, watching the business I’d built phase out, and finding myself taking on two jobs to cover the bills rolling in. That’s not even to speak of the wall of distrust that built up around me which has made relationships of any kind pretty challenging to say the least.  I felt alone and isolated.  I was treading water.

Occasionally, my inner adventurer would poke me and ask, “When are we leaving?” or say things like, “What are you doing here?” I learned to squash that voice for awhile reminding it of our “survival” and my “new found belief in practicality”.

Somehow, I connected the events in my life to being irresponsible and impractical.  Because I didn’t fit into a “proper” box, I should work harder to shove myself in there and work it with a smile from 9-5, damn it!  “Then bad things like these wouldn’t happen to you”, I said.

I told myself to grow up! because that’s what I thought all grown ups eventually did.  They gave up their dreams and settled (down). My whole life I rebelled against this for the simple fact that I never met a grown up who was happier at work than they were at happy hour.

No matter how hard I tried to shut myself down, eventually my mind made me listen to that voice.  I was terrified.  I began to sob.  I knew I wasn’t happier in this cookie cutter life.  I proved that I was responsible and practical and that I could work 9-5.  I could get through a divorce and keep my house. And now what?

I felt like I was trapped in the Matrix and I wanted to swallow a red pill and see how deep the rabbit hole goes.

So, I did and I’m about to find out what’s down there.